There Once Was a Man Called...
Arthur was unsurprised when he heard a very loud crash coming from the doorway of his chambers. It was a noise he was accustomed to now. He heard the crash but did not bother to look up from the papers he was reading through. He knew who it was.
"What have you done this time Merlin?"
Arthur glanced over the top of the papers with his best 'I'm so not convinced' Gaius-like raised eyebrow.
Merlin was kneeling on the floor picking up the remains of a plate, with what was previously Arthur's
dinner scattered all around him on the floor.
Arthur sighed, slammed down the papers on the table and then walked towards Merlin, until he was towering over his manservant. Arthur put his hands on his hips, looking down at Merlin as he jeered.
"There once was a man called Merlin,
who was incredibly slow at learning,
how to be a good servant,
as he was so unobservant,
he tripped through the door
and dropped my meal on the floor."
Merlin glowered up at him, eyes darkening with defiance. He retorted with as much venom as the giant reptilian thing Arthur had killed that day.
"There once was a man called Arthur
who was the Prince 'cus the King was his father.
He was a prat
And I told him that
But it's fine
Because we all know its fact."
Arthur stood, mouth opening and closing, attempting to find a good enough come back, but failed. He soon gave up and headed back to his table and his papers.
Merlin smirked triumphantly after him, proud to have gained the last word for once, until Arthur turned around, having thought of something to say, an identical smirk plastered on his face.
"You can go back down to the kitchens Merlin and ask cook to make me another identical meal to the one you've just so carelessly destroyed. You can then bring it back up here and clean up the mess you've made."
Merlin's face paled. Arthur knew that the head of the kitchen cooks was a terrifying woman, with a head of mad curly grey hair and angry eyes. Merlin was almost always being shouted at by her for something or other, and Arthur knew that Merlin was rather terrified of her.
"Do I have to?" Merlin complained.
"You know I'd rather be put in the stocks for all of tomorrow than face her wrath."
"Well that can easily be arranged." Arthur shrugged.
Merlin immediately decided against that idea "On the other hand..." And he rushed to the door.
"Oh and tell her I expect it ready within the next hour."
Merlin glared at him and he opened the door. "I hate you."
"I love you too Merlin."
Merlin scowled, though unable to hide the sparkle in his eye at Arthur's words, before slamming the door behind him.
Arthur leant back triumphantly in his chair, grinning to himself. No-one got the better of Arthur Pendragon.